Good things come...

Well, just when I thought that the universe couldn't be all "that" cruel, that something had to give... it did. I met a really nice guy last week. His name is Shawn, from Northern Ontario - North Bay, to be precise. He's 29, slightly taller, slightly heavier (although that's in context - I've lost a considerable amount of weight in the past few weeks, thanks to my new externally imposed fiscal restraint policy resulting in decreased caloric intake - meaning, I ain't got no money to eat nuffin'), and has the most amazing, gorgeous aqua green/blue eyes I've ever seen. Damn, I sound like one of those sappy, insipid people now ~ who the fuck stole my angst? Seriously, I spent last Saturday night at his place watching videos (this really stupid Hong Kong action flick, So Close; and then the most wonderful anime I've seen, Spirited Away - you simply MUST see this if you haven't already) and getting to know one another. He was incredibly shy, but finally he planted a kiss on me, I put my arm around him whilst we were watching the movie and when it became too late for me to take the subway home, he invited me to stay the night. Which I did, natch. We've not been able to see each other this week due to various work commitments, but we're planning to see each other at some stage during the weekend. I can't believe its me saying this about him, or anyone romantically linked with me, but I really do miss the bloke. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoy his company, but other than my friends and family I never thought I'd ever meet anyone again who did something for me, other than stir the loins. Anyway, before I get all, you know, dripping with yucky sentimentality (its so VERY cold in my heart, you see) lemme update my current Random Playlist of the week: 1. Fine Day (James Holden Remix) - Kirsty Hawkshaw 2. One More Time - Daft Punk 3. Hold On To Me - Cowboy Junkies 4. Send Angels - Plumb 5. Jerusalem - Sinead O'Connor 6. If It Makes You Happy - Sheryl Crow 7. The Sound Of - Jann Arden 8. Come Into My World - Kylie Minogue 9. Independence Day - Melanie C (the best Spice Girl, if you ask me) 10. ...On the Radio - Nelly Furtado Kinda interesting how that works - can't wait to see what my next selections will be... Haven't heard from Andrea, Mark or Marie lately. They've all been on my mind a lot lately - as have a lot of my Aussie mates. Could it be that the first round of AFL is only a month away? (Go the Dons!) Could it be that I wanna go back? Could it be that I'm starting to think that the past year was nothing but a dream? Yes.

10 @ Random

I'm making my 10 Random Songs playlist public. This is kind of like bibliomancy, the method of telling the future by picking a section in a book at random as an answer to the querent's question. Take these as my random lessons and messages to be learned this week? Maybe not. 1. Something More Besides You - Cowboy Junkies This is one song that will always remind me of being in my place on Queen West, in the summer, having Diane over for dinner of seared scallops and mango/cucumber salsa. 2. One by One - Enya Driving home from working at Quartet years ago, in an absolute blizzard just knowing that I was going to panic unless I had something to help keep me calm and grounded. This did the trick. 3. Out of Reach - Gabrielle This one reminds me of the day that I dumped Mark rather unceremoniously after seeing Bridget Jones' Diary. Man, I was such a shit that day. 4. Stay - Lisa Loeb Reality Bites - sometimes it does. 5. Only Happy When It Rains - Garbage I got nothin' for this one. But its cool. 6. Holiday - Madonna Good times, good times. 7. Forgotten - Linkin Park A new one to me, don't know it well - but fun anyway. 8. Out of the City (Starchaser Mix) - 2 Heads This SO reminds me of Kat and I doing paintings on Arts and Crafts Sunday after a massive session the night before. Good old Carlton helped ease the pain that day - as did this song. 9. Another Woman - Moby Not sure about this one - again, I got nuffin. 10. Spin Spin Sugar - Sneaker Pimps This was the last song that Mary and I danced to, just preceding the breakup of Meric. I really do wish she'd stayed on the Prozac, if her entire personality hadn't shifted from fun to LESBIOT we may still have been friends. Anyway, give it a whirl, you may be surprised.

Hiatus

I know its been some time since I've updated my journal, but I've been going through some strange things lately. I'm working now (FINALLY) but I'm doing collections. Talk about a cruel joke on me - I left the most beautiful place in the world because I didn't want to be doing collections for the foreseeable future, and now I'm doing exactly what I'd rather not be doing. Anyway, the job itself isn't that bad, the people are decent (if a little lower in social stature than I normally would associate with - gawd that sounded snotty, but somewhat true). I've been out for drinks this week with them and realize that I can now really feel comfortable associating with pretty much anyone (as long as they don't know the "real" me - meaning the poofter bit). So, I've not been writing... what's up with that, anyway? Well, I've literally been on hiatus from the public journal writing and I've been doing heaps of personal, soulsearching type stuff. I've been doing this Cheryl Richardson program, endorsed and recommended by none other than Oprah herself. Its taken a lot of work on my part and a lot of writing which I've been doing in a nifty new (and cheap) journal. This stuff is all about me, and is intensely personal. Thus, I've not much felt like sharing online as yet. Once I get to something that I need to publically announce, if I do get there at all, then I'll post it. In other news, Valentine's Day was fun - if a bit strange. Michelle, Adam, Will (the guy Adam works with) and I tried to go out to 5ive but the queue was hours long and the club was already at capacity. Adam and I reckon that there's got to be a backdoor entrance from our building (cause we live in the same building as the nightclub). Anyway, after watching an overdose at the coffee house next door we decided to get out to one of Michelle's favourite places called the Dance Cave. NOT fun place, WAY expensive cover, WAY WAY expensive coat check. Music kinda sucked - but the funniest part was seeing this tiny little chinese poof dancing like he was in some kind of cult or something. Strangest damn thing. Ended up for last orders at Woody's again - seems to be the place for it lately (wrapped up the night on Friday with Peter and Ida at the same place - very funny stuff to see conservative Ida watching the International Men of Leather competition (circa 2001) video while sipping her citrus vodka tonic). Speaking of Woody's, I'm heading there tonight to spend some quality time with the Mark/c/o's and Randy. Haven't seen the Mark/c/o's in ages - before Christmas in fact. Will be nice to hang out with some less boozy people for a bit - will help curb this nasty little drinking habit I've developed. Friday - smashed. Saturday - pissed. Sunday - pleasantly numb. Monday - LOADED. Tuesday - HUNG OVER. Anyway, I'm so going to get busted for spending too much time online here at work, so I'm gonna go for now. Know this, all my lovely readers, I will return in short order- just taking a short break to get my shit together. Once I do, I'll let you know all (or most of it anyway).

Holy crap...

I'm sitting in the tearoom at work, having just spent the last hour sitting with a collector working some student loan accounts. Karen's really nice, and its seems that although the company told me a lot before I started, they didn't tell me quite everything. Turns out that a lot of regular collections people here are on lower base salaries, but are actually making COMMISSION on what they bring in. For instance, on the files Karen works on, she brings home 16.4% on EVERYTHING. Holy crap. Imagine you bring in $10,000 - that's another $1,640 in your pocket. Double it (most quotas here are around the $20,000 mark anyway) and you're looking at $3,280 AFTER you get your regular pay. Perhaps this won't be so bad after all - if I can get the licence to do this anyway. I'm going to be told this arvo what I'll actually be doing, hopefully I'm on a similar structure, but we'll see. If not, I'll just take my licence and go play with Dun & Bradstreet again. In other news, I'm feeling somewhat better today after hearing back from some of my awesome friends. Their kind words of support has certainly hit home - in particular one email from my friend Jen brought a few stings of tears to my eyes first thing this morning. Gotta run - time to smoke.

Well, I know its been absolutely ages since I wrote last in here, but there's been nothing much of good news to report. I completely agree with Andrea that this month (well, January) has completely sucked. I'm not sure if focussing on the negative is helpful or not, but let's get that out of the way. I had SO many interviews, and no one call back. The jobs I was offered were crap. I couldn't pay my rent for February so Adam paid it (gee, I'm further indebted to him now, lovely). The job I did get, I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to keep (not the telemarketing one, I canned that one pretty damn quick). Nope, I'm working for a collection agency now, and shock of horrors - they need to get licences for ALL the provinces so that I can work legally doing this. Going to cost me an additional $195 that they'll deduct off my already crappy paycheque that I don't get to see for another two weeks. Hopefully the money I do have holds out till then. I'm not even sure if I'll be able to qualify for the licences or not. Besides the crappy job situation (which, Universe help me, will change soon) there was also the scare of my mum being in hospital. Anyone who knows me for any length of time knows that I'm freaked right out about seeing her in hospital given the whole kidney transplant and immune suppression thing - so it was pretty freakin' scary. Turns out she was in ICU for about 3 days before being moved to the regular medical ward for another 4 days. Nice thing though, went up to see her in hospital on the first day I heard about it - and ended up spending the whole day with my dad. Never done that before. Was kind of cool to hear about the things that he thinks about - the crazy things he dreams up as ways to fall asleep. I've never really given him enough credit, and I'm glad that finally, in both our old ages that I'm able to see him for who he is; not just my dad, but as a person as well. Mum is better now - the antibiotics worked a treat and got rid of both the nasty stomach and chest infections in record time. Told her she should never have gone to the hospital to visit my uncle's wife! So, you know how all bad things come in threes? Let's recap - SHITTY job sitch. Mum in hospital with some NASTY bug. And then as of Friday night - my iBook shuts itself down for some reason. It was really late so I didn't worry about it, but when I went to boot it on Saturday - NOTHING. Got to the Login Window Starting stage - and NUFFING. Nada. Zip. Rang Apple support and got some freebie support (honey, not vinegar was used in this application) basically telling me I had to reinstall EVERYTHING. Massive fragmentation of the harddrive resulting in non-recoverable sectors. Shit. Didn't have any of the CD's to install with, so panic-stricken Eric rings his brother, gets the CD's delivered to the parentals so I can get at them on Sunday (see later entry). So, if shit happens, I've had enough. If it comes in threes, I'm through. Bring on the good stuff, cause I can't take much more of the anxiety waiting for the other shoe to drop. Anyway, in other news - I met a guy last week over coffee. Nice enough bloke, we chatted over 2 hours over hot apple cider about photography, the different cameras we'd had, the quality factor when considering digital vs. film etc Kodak has now said that they're discontinuing the production of all film cameras in the western world, but will continue to make film. They're going completely digital now . Went over to his place on Friday for a nice couple of beers and a chat - get your minds out of the gutter people! We had a perfectly pleasant evening of chatting by his electric fireplace (and yes, he has a sheepskin rug in front of it, IKEA natch) but we certainly didn't get naked in front of it. Anyway, he's nice enough, but doesn't really make me pant, nor pine, nor ponder what may be. Guess its good enough that I get out of the house and start meeting some people, right? Speaking of getting out of the house - I had Michelle and Gen over on Saturday night for the First Annual Eric & Michelle's Unofficial Official New Year Party. January 31st, you see! After much candle burning, Wolf Blass drinking and the arrival of Adam to complete the foursome we toasted the New Year to the champas and lichee liqueur that Gen brought to donate to the cause. Michelle and I got elected (well, we kind of elected ourselves) to go and get pizza slices cause the nachos and salsa and sour cream & onion crisps just weren't cutting it. On go the clothes, boots and hats and out we went. Next thing I know, Michelle and I both ponder if we'd make it for last call at Woody's. Turns out, yep! We got a quick little drink and in the haze that has become my recollection of the evening I remember us trying to pick up some poor guy named Andrew in a military inspired jumper, feeling his ass up, getting his phone number, getting pizza and returning to the loft. After Michelle finally gave up the ghost (Lightweight Linda, she is) and went to bed, Adam put Gen to bed on the sofa and retired himself (all round the half 2 mark). Well, Michelle and I kept giggling in bed till we decided to ring up this Andrew bloke. At 2:30am. What the hell, its New Year, right? He chatted a bit to us, but he just didn't respond to our advances for him to come over and play ;-) Sunday was a bit of a write off, and a bit of a blessing. Went to my parents to repair the iBook as previously noted, but Peter came and picked me up at the bus terminal so we could hang out. Got him a shoddy haircut at FirstChoice (last choice) and had Wendy's for tea. Haven't had Wendy's in YONKS. Yummers! Finally got the 'Book reinstalled, hung out at the parents for a bit and Peter drove me back to the subway (bless!). Made it home in time for Survivor: All Star. With the exception of a few of them, I kinda think its going to be Survivor: All Starve. They look as though they learnt nothing the whole time they were away the first game. All I have to say is RUPERT RUPERT RUPERT. They should just give the man the $Million. Okay, I've said enough for today and I've got to get to bed - have to get up in 5 hours and I'm already exhausted from complete insomnia. Can you really blame me? I'll probably write more tomorrow when I have my second day of work. Still have heaps to gab about but I'm babbling now.